My Mother has passed

My mother died last night in New Zealand.
Both my brother and I wish we could truly mourn and that we could celebrate her life. Sadly we cannot.
I find the genre of childhood misery confessions books tasteless in the extreme and I have no intention of writing anything like that. All I want to say is that not everyone who is capable of giving birth is capable of mothering and this most certainly applies to our mother.
There are good things that came from such a childhood.
Both my brother and I had no second thoughts at all about leaving home. Had we been raised by a loving and caring mother there is a chance we could still be living in Hamilton.Sorry Hamilton but not a nice thought. We both used education as a means of escape. Both my children value education as well and this gives me such happiness.
Secondly I am grateful to all the people throughout my life who have shown me kindness, generosity and by example how to be a good person. I do not know what would have happened to me had I not known such people especially during my teens and young adulthood.
Finally my main coping mechanism as a child was, at the risk of sounding crude, to grab happiness by the balls. To relish every moment of happiness life offered. Trust me this is a pretty good if simplistic way to live.
For Halachic and personal reasons there will be no Shiva or anything resembling one but if anyone wants to join me for tea served in my nicest cups from the silver teapot please do.